Nutrition & Exercise: The Facts

Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?
A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it...don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.

Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?
A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable slop.

Q: Is beer or wine bad for me?
A: Look, it goes to the earlier point about fruits and vegetables. As we all know, scientists divide everything in the world into three categories: animal, mineral, and vegetable. We all know that beer and wine are not animal, and they are not on the periodic table of elements, so that only leaves one thing, right? My advice: Have a burger and a beer and enjoy your liquid vegetables.

Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
A: Well, if you have a body, and you have body fat; your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.

Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain....Good.

Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
A: You're not listening. Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?

Q: What's the secret to healthy eating?
A: Thicker gravy.

Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?
A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.

Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
A: Are you crazy? HELLO ..... Cocoa beans ... another vegetable!!!

Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets. Have a cookie ... flour is a veggie! One more thing..."When life hands you lemons, ask for a bottle of tequila and some salt."

Nun

A guy is walking up to a doctor's office when a nun comes running out screaming and crying.

The guy walks in and says, "Doc, what's with the nun?"

The doctor says, "Oh, I just told her she's pregnant."

The guy says, "The nun's pregnant?"

The doctor says, "No. But it certainly cured her hiccups!"

Golfing Injury

A man staggers into an emergency room with two black eyes and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat.

Naturally the doctor asks him what happened.

"Well, it was like this," said the man.

"I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife, when she sliced her ball into a pasture of cows."

"We went to look for it, and while I was rooting around I noticed one of the cows had something white at its rear end. I walked over and lifted up the tail, and sure enough, there was my wife's golf ball........stuck right in the middle of the cow's butt. That's when I made my mistake....."

"What did you do?" asks the doctor.

"Well, I lifted the tail and yelled to my wife, 'Hey, this looks like yours!'"

Career Change

A gynecologist decides that he needs a change of pace, so he leaves the medical field to become an auto mechanic.

After many months laboring at auto mechanic school, the day finally comes to take his final exam.

He takes the exam and completes it in the required time, then leaves.

When he gets his exam grade in the mail, he is shocked, yet pleasantly surprised to find that his final grade on the exam is 200%.

As he reviews the exam in closer detail, he notices some remarks written by the professor, which read:

"50% for taking the engine apart correctly, 50% for putting it back together correctly, and an extra 100% for doing it all through the muffler."

NASA

It was a celebratory mood with the boys at NASA; they had just made the scientific achievement of a lifetime.

As they were uncorking a bottle of champagne, Dr. Lowenstein, the head scientist at NASA, asked everyone to be quiet as he had received a congratulatory phone call from the President of the United States.

He picked up a special red phone, and spoke into it. "Mr. President," said Dr. Lowenstein, grinning broadly, "after twelve years of hard research and billions of dollars spent, we have finally found intelligent life on Mars."

He listened for a second, and his smile gradually disappeared, replaced by a frown.

He said, "But that's impossible . . . we could never do it. . . yes Mr.. President," and hung up the phone.

He addressed the crowd of scientists staring at him curiously. "I have some bad news," he said, "the President said that now that we've found intelligent life on Mars . . . he wants us to try to find it in Congress."

Praying for a Bike

A little boy wanted $100 to buy a new bike, and his mother told him to pray to God for it. He prayed and prayed for two weeks, but nothing turned up. Then he decided perhaps he should write God a letter requesting the $100.00.

When the postal authorities received the letter addressed to God, they opened it up and decided to send it to the President. The President was so impressed, touched and amused that he instructed his secretary to send the little boy a check for $5.00. He thought that this would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy.

The little boy was delighted with the $5.00 and sat down to write a thank-you letter to God, which read:

Dear God;
Thank you very much for the money. I noticed that you had to send it through Washington. As usual, they deducted $95.00 for themselves.

Speech Writer

If I were George W. Bush's Speech Writer…

"Good evening my fellow Americans. First I want to pass on condolences to the people of New York and all Americans that are hurting in this tragic time. Rest assured that anything and everything that can be done to assure the safety of our Country, will be done."

"This is the greatest country in the world and we will get through this trying time. Now is the time for all people to set aside our petty differences and show the world that no one and nothing can destroy the fortitude of the American people."

"To the people responsible for this tragedy, I say this- Are you f*cking kidding me? Are the turbans on your heads wrapped too tight? Have you gone too long without a bath? Do you not know who you are f*cking with?"

"Americans are so hungry to kill, that we shoot at each other every day. We will relish the opportunity for new targets of our aggression. Have you forgotten history? What happened to the last people that started f*cking around with us? Remember the little yellow bastards over in Japan? We slapped them all over the Pacific and roasted about 2 million of them in their own back yard. That's what we in America call a big-ass Barbecue."

"Ever seen Texas on a map? Ever wonder why it's so big? Because we wanted it that way. Mexico started jacking around with the Alamo and now they cut our lawns. Ask your buddy Saddam about f*cking with the good ole USA. The only reason he got away the first time is because it's too hard to shoot someone when you're doubled over laughing at them."

"Our soldiers aren't trained to laugh and shoot at the same time. Now he couldn't stop a pack of cub scouts from taking over his shitty little country. Trust us, Afghanistan will end up a giant kitty litter box. Go ahead and try to hide Bin Laden. There's not a hole deep enough or a mountain high enough that's going to keep your camel riding asses safe."

"We will bomb every inch of the country that harbors him, his camps and any place that looks and even smells like he was there. Hell, we might even drop a few bombs on people that have p*ssed us off in the past. This is America - we kick ass. This is what we do. Go ahead and laugh now, but the Tomahawks are coming and we will smoke your sorry asses. God bless America."

A Guide To Politics

Feudalism:
You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.

Pure socialism:
You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else's cows. You have to take care of all the cows. The government gives you as much milk as you need.

Bureaucratic socialism:
You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else's cows. They are cared for by ex-chicken farmers. You have to take care of the chickens the government took from the chicken farmers. The government gives you as much milk and as many eggs as the regulations say you should need.

Fascism:
You have two cows. The government takes both, hires you to take care of them, and sells you the milk.

Pure communism:
You have two cows. Your neighbors help you take care of them, and you all share the milk.

Russian communism:
You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the government takes all the milk

Dictatorship:
You have two cows. The government takes both and shoots you.

Singaporean democracy:
You have two cows. The government fines you for keeping two unlicensed farm animals in an apartment.

Militarianism:
You have two cows. The government takes both and drafts you.

Pure democracy:
You have two cows. Your neighbors decide who gets the milk.

Representative democracy:
You have two cows. Your neighbors pick someone to tell you who gets the milk.

American democracy:
The government promises to give you two cows if you vote for it. After the election, the president is impeached for speculating in cow futures. The press dubs the affair "Cowgate."

British democracy:
You have two cows. You feed them sheep's brains and they go mad. The government doesn't do anything.

Bureaucracy:
You have two cows. At first the government regulates what you can feed them and when you can milk them. Then it pays you not to milk them. After that it takes both, shoots one, milks the other and pours the milk down the drain. Then it requires you to fill out forms accounting for the missing cows.

Anarchy:
You have two cows. Either you sell the milk at a fair price or your neighbors try to kill you and take the cows.

Capitalism:
You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.

Hong Kong capitalism:
You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publicly-listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt / equity swap with associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax deduction for keeping five cows. The milk rights of six cows are transferred via a Panamanian intermediary to a Cayman Islands company secretly owned by the majority shareholder, who sells the rights to all seven cows' milk back to the listed company. The annual report says that the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. Meanwhile, you kill the two cows because the fung shiu is bad.

Environmentalism:
You have two cows. The government bans you from milking or killing them.

Feminism:
You have two cows. They get married and adopt a veal calf.

Totalitarianism:
You have two cows. The government takes them and denies they ever existed. Milk is banned.

Political correctness:
You are associated with (the concept of "ownership" is a symbol of the phallo-centric, war-mongering, intolerant past) two differently-aged (but no less valuable to society) bovines of non-specified gender.

Counter culture:
Wow, dude, there's like... these two cows, man. You got to have some of this milk.

Surrealism:
You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.

Libertarianism:
You have two cows. One has actually read the constitution, believes in it, and has some really good ideas about government. The cow runs for office, and while most people agree that the cow is the best candidate, nobody except the other cow votes for her because they think it would be "throwing their vote away."

Dilemma

With all your honor and dignity what would you do? This test only has one question, but it’s a very important one. Please don’t answer it without giving it some serious thought. By giving an honest answer you will be able to test where you stand morally. The test features an unlikely, completely fictional situation, where you will have to make a decision one way or the other. Remember that your answer needs to be honest. Please scroll down slowly and consider each line - this is important for the test to work accurately.

You’re in Washington. There is great chaos going on around you, caused by a hurricane and severe floods. There are huge masses of water all over you. You are a photographer and you are in the middle of this great disaster. The situation is nearly hopeless. You’re trying to shoot very impressive photos. There are houses and people floating around you, disappearing into the water. Nature is showing all its destructive power and is ripping everything away with it.

Suddenly you see a man in the water, he is fighting for his life, trying not to be taken away by the masses of water and mud. You move closer. Somehow the man looks familiar. Suddenly you know who it is - it’s George W Bush ! At the same time you notice that the raging waters are about to take him away, forever. You have two options. You can save him or you can take the best photo of your life. So you can save the life of George Bush or you can shoot a Pulitzer prize winning photo, a unique photo displaying the death of the country's President.

And here’s the question (please give an honest answer):

Would you select color film, or rather go with the classic simplicity of black and white?

Al Gore's New Program

Al Gore was entertaining Joe Leiberman and decided to show off his new home. Upon entering the bedroom, Joe noticed a very large wooden box with 5 empty beer cans and about $1500.00 in cash.

Out of curiosity, Joe asked ''AL, I see you're a beer drinker, I am too! you see, we DO have something in common''

With a condescending voice, Al quipped, '' yes, of course we do Joe''

Joe then asked '' Al, why the 5 empty cans and all that cash''

Al gladly told Joe about his new program. '' Joe, since last month, I have decided to turn a new leaf and become a more accountable person, while at the same time rewarding myself for my efforts. Whenever I tell a lie, I drink a beer and put the can in this box''

''That's really impressive'', Joe replied, ''only 5 beer cans in a whole month, but tell me, where did all that cash come from''?

Without missing a beat, Al responded, ''Whenever the box gets full of beer cans, I take it down to the recycling center, you know how concerned I am about environmental issues'

Bush and Gore

Bush and Gore were sitting in a restaurant to discuss the craziness of the election.

When the waitress came to take their orders, Gore said, "I'll take the steak."

When she asked Bush, he said, "I'll take the quickie."

Gore motioned for the waitress to come closer, and whispered into her ear  "He means the quiche."

Conversation...

between Condeliza Rice and George Bush featuring: Hu Jintao, President of China, UN Secretary-General Kofi Annan and the late PLO Chief Yasser Arafat.

George: Condi! Nice to see you. What's happening?

Condi: Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China.

George: Great. Lay it on me.

Condi: Hu is the new leader of China.

George: That's what I want to know.

Condi: That's what I'm telling you.

George: That's what I'm asking you. Who is the new leader of China?

Condi: Yes.

George: I mean the fellow's name.

Condi: Hu.

George: The guy in China.

Condi: Hu.

George: The new leader of China.

Condi: Hu.

George: The Chinese guy!

Condi: Hu is leading China.

George: Now whaddya' asking me for?

Condi: I'm telling you Hu is leading China.

George: Well, I'm asking you. Who is leading China?

Condi: That's the man's name.

George: That's who's name?

Condi: Yes.

George: Will you or will you not tell me the name of the new leader of China?

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Yasser? Yasser Arafat is in China? I thought he was in the Middle East.

Condi: That's correct.

George: Then who is in China?

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Yasser is in China?

Condi: No, sir.

George: Then who is?

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Yasser?

Condi: No, sir.

George: Look, Condi. I need to know the name of the new leader of China. Get me the Secretary General of the U.N. on the phone.

Condi: Kofi?

George: No, thanks.

Condi: You want Kofi?

George: No.

Condi: You don't want Kofi?

George: No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk. And then get me the U.N.

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Not Yasser! The guy at the U.N.

Condi: Kofi?

George: Milk! Will you please make the call?

Condi: And call who?

George: Who is the guy at the U.N?

Condi: Hu is the guy in China.

George: Will you stay out of China?!

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: And stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at the U.N.

Condi: Kofi.

George: All right! With cream and two sugars. Now get on the phone.

Condi (picks up the phone): Rice here.

George: Rice? Good idea. And a couple of egg rolls, too. Maybe we should send some to the guy in China. And the Middle East. Can you get Chinese food in the Middle East?

Great Loss

George W. Bush was visiting an elementary school, and the 4th grade class he sat through began a discussion related to words and their meanings.

The teacher asked the President if he would like to lead the class in a discussion of the word "tragedy." So, George W. asked the class for an example of a tragedy.

One boy stood up and said, "If my best friend who lives next door is playing in the street and a car comes along and runs him over, that would be a tragedy."

"No," said Bush, "that would be an accident."

A girl raised her hand and said, "If a school bus carrying 50 children drove off a cliff, killing everyone on board, that would be a tragedy."

"I'm afraid not," the President said. "That's what we would call a Great Loss."

The room went silent. No other children volunteered. President Bush searched the room and asked, "Isn't there someone here who can give me an example of a tragedy?"

Finally, way in the back of the room, Johnny raised his hand, and in a quiet voice, he said, "If Air Force One, carrying Mr. and Mrs. Bush, was struck by a missile and blown up to smithereens, THAT would be a tragedy."

"That's right! And can you tell me WHY that would be a tragedy?" asked the President.

"Well," Johnny said, "because it wouldn't be an accident and it sure as hell wouldn’t be a Great Loss..."

Classic Hack

Here is a story about one of the classic computer hacks.

Back in the mid-1970s, several of the system support staff at Motorola discovered a relatively simple way to crack system security on the Xerox CP-V timesharing system. Through a simple programming strategy, it was possible for a user program to trick the system into running a portion of the program in `master mode' (supervisor state), in which memory protection does not apply. The program could then poke a large value into its `privilege level' byte (normally write-protected) and could then proceed to bypass all levels of security within the file-management system, patch the system monitor, and do numerous other interesting things. In short, the barn door was wide open.

Motorola quite properly reported this problem to Xerox via an official `level 1 SIDR' (a bug report with an intended urgency of `needs to be fixed yesterday'). Because the text of each SIDR was entered into a database that could be viewed by quite a number of people, Motorola followed the approved procedure: they simply reported the problem as `Security SIDR', and attached all of the necessary documentation, ways-to-reproduce, etc.

The CP-V people at Xerox sat on their thumbs; they either didn't realize the severity of the problem, or didn't assign the necessary operating-system-staff resources to develop and distribute an official patch.


Months passed. The Motorola guys pestered their Xerox field-support rep, to no avail. Finally they decided to take direct action, to demonstrate to Xerox management just how easily the system could be cracked and just how thoroughly the security safeguards could be subverted.

They dug around in the operating-system listings and devised a thoroughly devilish set of patches. These patches were then incorporated into a pair of programs called `Robin Hood' and `Friar Tuck'. Robin Hood and Friar Tuck were designed to run as `ghost jobs' (daemons, in UNIX terminology); they would use the existing loophole to subvert system security, install the necessary patches, and then keep an eye on one another's statuses in order to keep the system operator (in effect, the super user) from aborting them.

One fine day, the system operator on the main CP-V software development system in El Segundo was surprised by a number of unusual phenomena. These included the following:

* Tape drives would rewind and dismount their tapes in the middle of a job. * Disk drives would seek back and forth so rapidly that they would attempt to walk across the floor. * The card-punch output device would occasionally start up of itself and punch a lace card. These would usually jam in the punch. * The console would print snide and insulting messages from Robin Hood to Friar Tuck, or vice versa. * The Xerox card reader had two output stackers; it could be instructed to stack into A, stack into B, or stack into A (unless a card was unreadable, in which case the bad card was placed into stacker B). One of the patches installed by the ghosts added some code to the card-reader driver... after reading a card; it would flip over to the opposite stacker. As a result, card decks would divide themselves in half when they were read, leaving the operator to re collate them manually.

Naturally, the operator called in the operating-system developers. They found the bandit ghost jobs running, and X'ed them... and were once again surprised. When Robin Hood was X'ed, the following sequence of events took place:

!X id1

id1: Friar Tuck... I am under attack! Pray save me! id1: Off (aborted)

id2: Fear not, friend Robin! I shall rout the Sheriff of Nottingham's men!

id1: Thank you, my good fellow!

Each ghost-job would detect the fact that the other had been killed, and would start a new copy of the recently slain program within a few milliseconds. The only way to kill both ghosts was to kill them simultaneously (very difficult) or to deliberately crash the system.

Finally, the system programmers did the latter --- only to find that the bandits appeared once again when the system rebooted! It turned out that these two programs had patched the boot-time OS image (the kernel file, in UNIX terms) and had added themselves to the list of programs that were to be started at boot time.

The Robin Hood and Friar Tuck ghosts were finally eradicated when the system staff rebooted the system from a clean boot-tape and reinstalled the monitor. Not long thereafter, Xerox released a patch for this problem.

It is alleged that Xerox filed a complaint with Motorola's management about the merry-prankster actions of the two employees in question. It is not recorded that any serious disciplinary action was taken against either of them.

Netscape Technical Support Folly

Tech: Internet Technical Support this is so-and-so speaking. May I have your username please?

Female Customer: Yes I want to speak to the person in charge immediately!

Tech: Speaking. What can I do for you?

Female Customer: I want to complain about the pornographic bookmarks your company put in my web browser!

Tech: We didn't put any pornographic bookmarks in your web browser.

Female Customer: Oh yes you did! I'm looking at them right now!

(Tech remembers the Netscape history list and grins to himself)

Tech: Where exactly are these "bookmarks" located?

Female Customer: In Netscape!

Tech: And where exactly in Netscape would that be?

Female: In that little list that comes down when you click the little down arrow!

Tech: The one right above the Net Search button?

Female Customer: Yes that one!

Tech: Miss, that's the Netscape history list. Netscape keeps the past ten links you typed in that box. The only way to put an address in that box is for someone to physically sit at your computer and type in a web address.

Female Customer: Well I certainly didn't type in those X rated web addresses!

Tech: Well somebody did. Who else has access to your computer, and uses the Internet?

Female Customer: Just me and my husband!

(Several seconds of silence pass ... Hey! I wasn't going to say it!)

Female Customer: ........ oh............. OOOH! ... Thank you.

(She quickly hung up)

Irish Bank Robbery

Excerpted from an article about a bank robbery which appeared in the Dublin Times (metropolitan edition, page 2A) on 2 March 1999:

Once inside the bank shortly after midnight, their efforts at disabling the internal security system got underway immediately. The robbers, who expected to find one or two large safes filled with cash and valuables, were surprised to see hundreds of smaller safes scattered throughout the bank.

The robbers cracked the first safe's combination, and inside they found only a bowl of vanilla pudding. As recorded on the bank's audio-tape system, one said, "At least we'll get a bit to eat,"

The robbers opened up a second safe, and it also contained nothing but vanilla pudding. The process continued until all the safes were opened.

They found not one pound sterling, a diamond, or an ounce of gold. Instead, all the safes contained covered bowls of pudding.

Disappointed, the robbers made a quiet exit, each leaving with nothing more than a queasy, uncomfortably full stomach.

The newspaper headline read:

IRELAND'S LARGEST SPERM BANK ROBBED EARLY THIS MORNING.

Wittle Wabbit

A little girl walks into a pet shop and asks in the sweetest little lisp: "Excuthe me, mithter, do you keep wittle wabbits?"

And the shopkeeper gets down on his knees, so that he's on her level, and asks: "Do you want a wittle white wabby or a soft and fuwwy bwack wabby or maybe one like that cute wittle bwown wabby over there?"

The little girl puts her hands on her knees, leans forward and says in a quiet voice: "I don't fink my pyfon really giveths a thit."

Lion Tamer

wo unemployed guys are talking. One says, "I'm going to become a lion tamer."

The other replies, "That's crazy, you don't know nothing about no lion taming."

"Yes I do!"

"Well, OK, answer me this. When one of those lions comes at you all roaring and biting, what you gonna do?"

"Well, then I take that big chair they all carry, and I stick it in his face until he backs down."

"Well, what if the lion takes that big paw, and hooks the chair with them big claws, and throws that chair out of the cage? What do you do then?"

"Well, then I takes that whip they all carry, and I whip him and whip him until he backs down."

"Well, what if that lion bites that whip with his big teeth, and bites it in two? What you gonna do then?"

"Well, then I take that gun they all carry, and I shoot him."

"Well, what if that gun doesn't work? What will you do then?"

"Well, then I pick up some of the shit that's on the bottom of the cage, and I throw it in his eyes, and I run out of
the cage."

"Well, what if there ain't no shit in the bottom of the cage? What you gonna do then?"

"Well, that's dumb. Cause if that lion comes at me, and he throws the chair out of the cage, and he bites the whip in two, and my gun don't work, there's going to be some shit on the bottom of that cage, you can bet on that."

Bill Clinton Clock

Hillary Clinton died and went to heaven. As she stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, she saw a HUGE wall of clocks behind him.
She asked, "What are the reasons for all those clocks?"
St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie, the hands on your clock will move."
"Oh," said Hillary, "whose clock is that?"
"That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she has never told a lie in all her long life."
"And whose clock is that?", said Hillary.
"That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have only moved twice, telling us that Honest Abe only told 2 lies in his entire life."
"Where's Bill's clock?" Hillary asked.
"Bill's clock is in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan."

Thoughts on Life

The 2 most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
Money can't buy happiness... But it sure makes misery easier to live with...
Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bullsh*t before.
Psychiatrists say that 1 of 4 people are mentally ill. Check 3 friends. If they're OK, you're it.
Nothing in the known universe travels faster than a bad check.
A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a unicorn.
It has recently been discovered that research causes cancer in rats.
If you are given an open-book exam, you will forget your book.
The trouble with doing something right the first time is that nobody appreciates how difficult it was.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
Paul's Law: You can't fall off the floor.
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
Paranoids are people, too; they have their own problems. It's easy to criticize, but if everybody hated you, you'd be paranoid, too.
A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell and make you feel happy to be on your way.
Vital papers will demonstrate their vitality by moving from where you left them to where you can't find them.
Law of Probability Dispersal: Whatever it is that hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.